Contentment is Key

Contentment; something we often claim to be, but are we really? If you were stripped of everything in this world but your life, would you still be at peace? Are you still at ease in the midst of storms, in confidence that everything will eventually work out? The fact of the matter is that it is easier said than done, but it IS still possible. Contentment is not a destination but an ongoing trip. 

Contentment is the state of happiness and satisfaction regardless of any situation. When you are satisfied, you're not looking at what is missing or what you want or need. More than likely, when you are not content, 

your focus has shifted to yourself or comparing your life to the lives of others. The main focus should always be to remember the good things God has done for you, to live a life of gratefulness. Being content does not mean you have to be excited and happy about everything, but its the peace of mind and realization that:

 - There is a time for everything and what is for YOU will never miss you.

- You may not be where you want to be, but you are better off than you were before.

- No matter the situation, you are at peace because you trust that it will all work out.

We all have plenty of things to be thankful for and yes life does not always go as planned and there are unexpected circumstances, but during those times we should always keep in mind the current BLESSINGS. Don't live in the past or worry about the future, but be content in the present.

With Love,

Benine and Le'Nae xoxo

Your Identity; What Christ Says About Who You Are

In case you missed Monday’s meeting, we discussed the topic “Identity in Christ”. Having an identity in Christ plays a large role in the life of the believer, but it can also bring hope to the unbeliever. While we live in a day and age that struggles with trying to find your identity, it’s amazing to know that there’s a God who is wiling to give us one by His undeserving grace that will last a lifetime!

Let’s take a look at your identity in Christ, or if you’re thinking about having a relationship with God, what it could be:

 I am chosen by God.

   Ephesians 1:4

    I am adopted by God.

   Ephesians 1:5

 I am a child of God in His family.

1 John 3:1

I am forgiven by God for all my sins.

1 John 1:9

I am reconciled to God, in harmony with Him.

Romans 5:10

I am seen by God as holy, blameless, above reproach.

Colossians 1:21-22

I am sealed with God’s Holy Spirit.

Ephesians 1:13

I am called to accomplish God’s purpose.

Romans 8:28, 30

I am a full citizen among God’s people.

Ephesians 2:19

I am justified- declared right in God’s sight.

Romans 5:1

I am sanctified- set apart by God’s spirit.

1 Corinthians 6:11

I am redeemed- bought with Christ’s blood.

Ephesians 1:7

I am cleansed by Christ’s blood for all my sin.

1 John 1:7

I am an heir of God and a joint-heir with Christ.

Romans 8:16, 17

     I am complete in Christ.

    Colossians 2:10

       I am an ambassador for Christ.

2 Corinthians 5:20

I am being conformed to the character of Christ.

Romans 8:29

Isn’t your identity amazing?! Be encouraged that you can live in this world without the pressures of trying to be someone you’re not! When you belong to Jesus Christ your identity is made known throughout all of heaven and the earth because of HIM! Why would you want the world to form your identity when this world will pass away as well as the people in it? Be encouraged sisters and we really hope to see you at our next meeting!


Benine & Le’Nae <3

S.O.S. Update!

S.O.S. is super excited to introduce our newest addition to the leadership team, Le'Nae Jenkins! Le'Nae is a passionate and very talented writer and blogger from Boston, Ma. Aside from writing, she loves fitness, Starbucks and basketball. We are so glad to have her as a co-leading sister and can't wait to share what we've been working on for the future of the organization. 

"God saved my soul in 2010 from an abusive relationship. Since then, God has healed me in many ways & has encouraged me to tell other women about the hope He has made available to all. As a 22 year old, I desire to see many young women saved & falling in love with Jesus. I am enthusiastic about the vision for S.A.V.E.D. & I'm even more enthusiastic about seeing many lives transformed by Christ!"

Behind Closed Doors: Secret Sin

            The secrecy, the shame, the guilty after effect; it’s not worth it. This is not a post to condemn but to HELP those struggling with masturbation and porn and to let them know that it IS possible to break free from. Believe it or not, it has become more common and serious than we make it out to be. Just to show you how real this is, let’s take a look at a few recent statistics. Did you know? That every 30 seconds, 28,258 internet users are viewing pornography? That the average age of first internet exposure to porn is 11 years old? Or that 90% of 8-16 year olds have watched porn online while doing homework? That’s just a few general statistics, but it doesn’t stop there. Most people think pornography is an issue just for men or children, but WOMEN are addicted too. 70% of women are keeping their addiction a secret,  1 of 3 visitors to adult websites are women, and a total of 9.4 million women access adult websites each month. Believe me when I say that masturbation and porn are dangerous issues that continue to get worse…in AND out of the church. Just like any other addiction, it’s not the easiest to quit, but at the end of the day, it will never be worth it.

          You know the cycle, you watch a little porn or see a dirty picture, and you get a little aroused and boom you’re in the mood, so you either have sex or you masturbate to please yourself, then the guilt sets in. “What have I done?” “Why do I keep doing this?” You just feel plain dirty.

          What is “Porn”? Material such as books, magazines, pictures, videos that depict erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement. Normally, sexual excitement leads to sexual action and that sexual action is either done with someone else or executed in the act of masturbation: erotic stimulation of one’s own genital organs by manual contact. Some of you may think to yourself that it’s “no big deal”, you’re not bothering or hurting anyone, right? WRONG. You’re hurting yourself. Whether you’re watching porn or having sex with someone else or you’re masturbating, you are still fornicating, which is clearly categorized as sinful. To clarify, the act of fornication is ANY sexual sin outside of marriage. God designed sex as a part of the unique relationship of marriage and marriage only, yet Satan has perverted this beautiful gift with the filth and lustfulness of pornography. When you fornicate, you are sinning against your own body. Yes, a sin is a sin is a sin and there is no greater or smaller degree, HOWEVER, sexual sin is very dangerous because it’s practically vandalism to the temple of God. If we truly believe in God, the Holy Spirit dwells in us. (1 Corinthians 6:19) Why do you do it? As a way to still please yourself while escaping actually acting out sexually, but the reality is if you’ve thought it or watched it, consider it done (Matthew 5:28).

           The lust, the fornication, the perverse thoughts, the secrecy, none of it is from God. But there is a way out. I pray that as you read this or share with someone who needs to read this that the Holy Spirit frees and delivers you from what you thought you couldn’t get away from. There IS a way out and that is through Jesus Christ. He laid His life on the cross  so that we could be free from ALL sin, so that we could be covered by His grace and mercy and be forgiven for all our mistakes. All it takes is for you to accept that this is a problem, give it to Christ and allow Him to make you a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17). There is no sin too big or unforgivable for Jesus to handle. He will always be waiting to help with open arms.

So, in order to give you advice that can actually help and not just tell you to “pray about it” (which is one thing you should still and always do!!), I was able to speak to some strong, transparent folks who dealt with and overcame their issues of masturbation and pornography. Here are a few steps that helped them and I pray it helps you too!

1.)    The first step to recovery is acceptance. Now that you’ve accepted you have a problem, take it to God and repent. Repent meaning admit your wrongdoing and TURN AWAY from. This means throw away any toys, delete pictures, block websites, anything you have to do to make it difficult for you to gain access.

2.)    Guard your heart (Proverbs 4:23). Keep away from music talking about sex or anything dirty, if you’re watching a movie or show that may have an intense sex scene, change the channel! Stop hanging around with people who always talk about sex. It’s just feeding your mind to desire what you shouldn’t.

3.)    Get accountability! Yes, I know it’s very hard to tell someone about your addiction but find someone that you can trust, that can lovingly accept to keep you accountable.  If you still can’t get yourself to tell someone here are a few websites that might help. (x3watch.org , covenanteyes.com) And you can always feel free to e-mail me privately at: savedisme@gmail.com
4.) Most importantly, spend more time with God.Without His help, it is impossible to overcome anything. Not by your own strength,  but His will you defeat this, always remember that. Pray to Him daily about it, or as many times as you have to. When you get the urge, break out into a worship song or just say "Jesus". Trust me, you wont think about that nasty picture you just had in your head after saying that.

God loves you, even through your sins and He desires to help you.You just need to be willing to be helped, accept Him and turn away from it all. I know you can, God knows you can, and YOU WILL!! God bless you! xoxo

Helpful Verses to Keep Close

2 Peter 2:19 – They promised them freedom, but they themselves are slaves of corruption. For whatever overcomes a person, to that he is enslaved.

Matthew 5:28 – But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman (understood for men as well) with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Philippians 4:8 – Finally brothers, whatever is true,  whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Galatians 5:16 – But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.

What IS the Gospel?!

         The Gospel, also known as the good news…the story of God sending His only Son to sacrifice His life in exchange for our salvation. Such a deep and beautiful concept but do we truly understand it and why we should share it everywhere we go, as much as we can?

The full story of the Gospel is found in the first 4 books of the New Testament: Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. The first three books recount (in similar, yet different ways) the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. –Sidenote: If you’re just starting your walk with Christ and getting into the Word, these four books would be a great place to start! In 1 Corinthians 15:1-5, the apostle Paul basically gives a brief summary of what the Gospel is.

15:1 Now I want to make clear for you, brothers and sisters, the gospel that I preached to you, that you received and on which you stand, 15:2 and by which you are being saved, if you hold firmly to the message I preached to you—unless you believed in vain. 15:3 For I passed on to you as of first importance what I also received—that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures, 15:4 and that he was buried, and that he was raised on the third day according to the scriptures, 15:5 and that he appeared to Cephas, then to the twelve…

          If you’re familiar with the Old Testament, you know that there were many laws and sacrifices that needed to be made in place of our uncleanliness and disobedience to God. In order to cancel out all these laws and break the veil (Hebrews 9:1-9), which  give us a direct relationship with God through Jesus, God sent His Son to Earth, made Him take on human form and knew He would be chosen over Barabas to be executed. Every whip, every strike, every insult that Jesus received on that cross, represented and took place of everything WE did wrong. God loved us SO MUCH that He was willing to let His ONLY Son be tortured for a people who weren’t even obedient to Him. Would you do the same? Let’s also keep in mind that Jesus took on human form and felt EVERY single pain like we do, yet He continued to endure it for the love of us and His father. He lived with us, He died for us and was resurrected, THAT is the gospel.

          Why share it? Because it’s the foundation of our faith; it shows how DEEP God’s love is for us. There is no other god with that same love, and there is no other story like it! The Gospel alone has the power to save and us sharing it with someone who knows nothing about it, makes one more person closer to salvation. We were created to spread this good news of God’s love and make disciples, all it takes is effort. Shall we begin?

Helpful Verses

Mark 16:15 – And He said to them, “Go into all the world and proclaim the gospel to the whole creation.”

Romans 1:16- For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes…”

John 3:16 – For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Additional Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6g698NXpgrI

Getting Back to the Heart of Worship

 

     Feeling disconnected or like something is missing? Have you tried everything to get back into the swing of things and nothing is working? Or do you feel like you're just living to get by? If you start to feel like you're just "going through the motions", God is longing for you! Either way, He longs for all of us but these are specific indications that you may need to reevaluate your relationship with Him. He must be at the center of everything we do. Often times we don't realize it but we claim God is our priority, yet we are not truly living as such. Maybe you've been working extra hours and by the time you get home, you're too tired to do anything or maybe you got into a situation that has led you to worry more about it than anything else. It happens to us all, but its time we regain focus, its time we get back to the heart of worship.
      What does "getting back to the heart of worship" really mean, you might ask? Aside from obeying Him, worship is our way of loving Him back. Worship isn't listening to gospel music and singing songs during church service; that's PRAISE. Worship is glorifying and acknowledging the importance of God in our lives. Yes, they go hand in hand but there is a difference. Praise can be part of our worship, but worship goes deeper. Its the realization that without God, we are nothing, that if it wasn't for Him in our lives, we would not be where we are. So who are we to put Him on the back burner because are "occupied" or "worried about" other things?! Yes, we are all busy but we make time for things that are important to us, and if our hearts truly belong to Christ, he should be our first priority, busy or not. He's never too busy to hear our prayers, nor does He forget to wake us up every morning because He simply cares for us.
      The best way to revamp your relationship with God is to intentionally spend time with Him. Not because it's "the right thing to do" or a "duty" but because you truly desire to. You can't get closer to a person unless you want to and make an effort to learn about them. The best way to learn about Jesus is through His word! Be creative, make a date out of it if you want to! Grab your favorite blanket, your bible, a journal and pen and find a corner on your floor, and just start praying, reading and journaling. (I strongly suggest journaling in order to help keep track of significant events in your life  and growth in your walk.) That's just one example, but there are so many different ways to spend time with Him. He is your friend, your counselor, your comforter, treat Him that way, don't wait for free time to spend with Him, make TIME for Him. Prayer will keep you in contact with Him, reading your bible will educate you about Him and journaling will help you remember important messages He has for you but sometimes your time with God may need to be complete silence. When we pray, we talk to God but we also need to be quiet enough to hear what He has to say to us. Remember the story of Mary and Martha? Jesus came to visit the two sisters one day, Martha ran around cooking, making sure the house was clean and doing all sorts of other things but Mary simply sat at Jesus's feet and listened to Him and He appreciated that more than any of the work Martha was doing because she had put HIM as a priority before anything else. (See Luke 10:38-42 for full story.) Take some time out tonight to hang out with Jesus and see how much better you will feel!


Prayer: Lord, help me get back to the heart of worship. Help me realize that without you at the center, I am nothing. Help me desire to intentionally spend time with you and sit at your feet just like Mary did. That I may enjoy your presence and make you a priority in my life regardless of how busy I am.

Helpful Verses:

Matthew 6:33- But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Romans 10:17 - So that faith comes from hearing and hearing by the word of God.

John 15:1-5 - I am the true vine and my father is the gardner. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does not bear fruit, He prunes; so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself, it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine, you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.

Let's Talk About Love (Not just romance.)

            Love is: dangerous, kind, selfless, patient, pure, risky, strengthening, unconditional, tough, hopeful, beautiful, sacrifice, encouraging and forgiving. These are just a few thoughts of what the girls described love as this past meeting. Such a small word, with such great and so many different meanings. How would YOU describe love if you had the chance? How do you love others? How do you recognize others' love for you? Today, the word is used so lightly that we have forgotten what it truly represents. 

           For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. - John 3:16. This is a verse we talk about and recite and see so often but do we really understand what it means? Does your definition of love match up with the love God has for us? For those of you with children, would you be willing to give up your ONLY child in place of someone who knowingly does you wrong continuously? Or think about your most prized possession or the person that means the most to you. Would you be willing to give that person away or let them be tortured and crucified for the sake of someone else who hurt or went against you? If you’re honest with yourself, the real answer is probably "no", but that’s just to show how deep God’s love for us is. He was able to give up someone so valuable, so dear, so unique and irreplaceable to Him for a world of sinners. I don’t know about you but that’s the deepest love I've ever seen! If we truly dig deep and try to understand this verse, we see such a beautiful sacrifice for us that we are nowhere near worthy of. Who are we to deserve such an unconditional act?

        Just like there are many descriptions of love, there are also many ways to show love. We were all created to emulate the love God has for us to our neighbor in any way we can; whether we know them or not. Last night, we also discussed the many "love languages". Everyone was created differently and everyone loves differently. For some, its physical contact, others its affirmation, others is acts of service and there are so many more. You can't expect someone to love you a certain way just because that's the way you love them. One thing we fail to acknowledge is that just because someone is showing it differently doesn't mean they don't love you. Society focuses so much on love being romance but there is SO much more to it. Love is forgiving through the hurt, anger and bitterness. Love is a simple smile to a stranger. Love is lending a helping hand even when its inconvenient or uncomfortable. Love is Jesus and even when you feel alone, His love will be there; unconditionally and eternally. I pray that you are able to feel this REAL love and share it with those around you. XO

             

Inner Beauty

Unfortunately, this month we were unable to have a meeting. We still would like to share thoughts on this month's topic!

For You created my inmost being;

You knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Your works are wonderful,

I know that full and well. 

    - Psalm 139: 13-14

            Society tells us that beauty is solely based upon physical appearance. A beautiful woman seems to be the one with long, straight hair, without blemishes, a fit body, the list can go on and on. The full meaning of beauty goes so much deeper than that. God's definition of beauty lies within our hearts.Your true, inner beauty is based on the confidence you have in yourself to know your identity in Christ, to know that you are FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made. You could have a great physical appearance, but is your heart in shape? We were created in God's image (Genesis 1:27), in order to reflect Him, not physically, but spiritually. How can I possibly reflect One so perfect and flawless, you may ask? The answer is to focus. Set your eyes on Christ. Realize that your validation comes from Him and Him ALONE. You don't need attention from the opposite sex, you don't need 100 likes on Facebook and Instagram, you don't need to be in a relationship to boost your confidence. You are so special and unique that God took the time to count every hair on your head, every freckle on your face, to mold the shape of your cheeks and most importantly to give you life. Embrace your natural features, don't seek to enhance them. That's almost like telling God you're not happy with His work. Just as much as you take joy in Him blessing you, see the way He created you as one of the biggest blessings you've ever received!
            God isn't concerned about your physical features, because He knows His works are good (Genesis 1:31).God looks at the personality that shapes your heart. All the outward beauty is fine and dandy now and will eventually fade but a beautiful soul will eternally please Him. Back to reflecting Him... A great way to start is with the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23) ; love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,faithfulness,gentleness and  self-control. Meditating on each one separately really does help to strengthen whichever weaknesses you may have (finding verses that talk about each one, thinking of ways to apply them to your daily life or even reflecting on times you could have used one or all of them). Now, this isn't to say that just because you are one of God's great creations that you shouldn't take care of yourself. Because we were created by God, we are His temple in which the Holy Spirit dwells. That means our bodies are SACRED and we all know that we should treat anything sacred with care. This includes everyday things like good hygiene (showering and brushing teeth twice a day, wearing deodorant and lotion), eating right! (a personal weakness, it took me a long time to finally let go of my fast food demons), staying active, yearly check-ups and so much more! Always remember, you are God's precious and unique creation, embrace and take care of yourself! xoxo

Finances/Budgeting

        

      

         It's time to create a budget and stop spending money, not knowing where it all went! A budget is an estimate of income and expenditure for a set period of time. We are going to focus more on a  MONTHLY budget just because that’s how frequent most of our bills are due. The importance of having a budget is a way for you to keep track of your money. If you don’t know what you’re spending your money on, you’ll never be able to see what you have been working for, or even save for things in the future. A budget also allows you to be smart with certain expenses. Maybe you noticed this month you spent more on eating out than you were supposed to, you’ll be able to figure out a game plan on how to spend less for next month. 

       From a Christian perspective, when creating a budget, your first priority should be tithing. Tithing is an opportunity for us to show God that He is first in our lives and to give Him back a portion of what He has given us, technically it’s all His. It is 10% (but not limited to, it can be more if your heart desires) of what you make. There isn't a clear scripture that says whether to tithe from your net or gross income. It is advised to tithe from your gross which is before taxes or anything else is taken out of it. This is one of the many ways of showing that God is your main priority.

     *Since we are budgeting on a monthly perspective let’s use the example of Suzy making $200 a week which is $600 a month.

     *For the month, $20 a week which is $80 a month should go to tithing. That leav her with $520 a month.

               After tithing, your next priority is making a realistic budget based on your necessary expenses. Create a budget where you have room to save but it doesn't lead you to constantly go into your savings to be able to pay for other things. Often times we think we can try and save more than half of our income a month but it just doesn't work like that. Even if the amount is as little as $50 a week, that will be about $1200 in six months so it all adds up. The best way to start a budget is making a list of all monthly expenses, starting off with bills and other priorities. For an example, Suzy who gets paid $600 a month has the following bills : $80 a month for tithing ,$90 a month for her phone, $120 for car insurance and she spends $40 weekly on gas which is $160 a month on gas. In total her “essential expenses" are: $450. That leaves her with $150 a month.

             Now that the important stuff is out of the way, the next category in your budget can be unnecessary expenses. This is really anything you want to put in and whichever amount you feel makes sense. It could be from eating out, maybe extra gas needed for unexpected places, even a little shopping. For that, Suzy puts away $100 a month, so $25 a week. She just knows that that is her limit a week if she wants to do extra stuff.

               Suzy is now left with $50 a month. THIS is what goes into her savings account each month. As you can see, it’s reasonable and it allows Suzy to afford everything without having to constantly go into her savings account. It seems like a little but like I said earlier, this “little” amount adds up long term.

*Try it out!! Make a list of your expenses for the month and specify each amount. Know your priorities and recognize your unnecessary expenses. After you've set this up, try putting it in a place where you'll be able to see it frequently and help you remember your limits. The more you organize, the more you save. Happy saving!

Relationships - Not just romance.

       As soon as we mention the word: relationships, everyone's thoughts automatically lead to wife/husband, girlfriend/boyfriend, but those aren't the only relationships God has given us to nurture. Close friends, distant friends, siblings, other family members, coworkers, classmates, parents are just a few on the list of important relationships we have a responsibility to take care of. A flower cannot grow, but instead withers when it isn't properly taken care of. It needs sunlight, moisture, the right soil, etc. The same goes for relationships; your effort into making it work is just as important as the next person's. The biggest lesson to learn in dealing with relationships is to LOVE. No, saying "I love you" occasionally and buying a few gifts here and there does not justify truly loving a person. The gospel tells us that Jesus loved us SO much, SO deeply that He sacrificed His own life for us!! *Mind blowing* Would you be willing to do the same for some of your relationships? Probably not. That's why we are not Jesus. All we can do is put in the most effort to emulate His love for us to others by serving them, being there for them when needed the most, supporting them and pushing them into a positive direction and most importantly leading by example. Sometimes it will require great sacrifice but just keep in mind that they will never amount to the greatest sacrifice of all time that was made for YOU. Do you find yourself growing in some of the relationships you are in or are they only setbacks to your purpose in life? That's not where it ends either though. Are you doing your part in the particular relationships as well?
        The topic of relationships is so broad that it is impossible to cover every single situation and question in a given amount of time. During our last two meetings, we were able to ask specific, anonymous questions that were read out loud and discussed by the group. There isn't ever a definite correct answer to every situation, but getting other's point of view will help put things in perspective more. This does not mean ask everyone you know but find someone you can truly trust to confide in and that is knowledgeable enough to speak life into you about the situation. No one can ever be an expert in relationships but we all can learn how to handle them better. These are a few principles however that can apply to a majority of relationships and if that still doesn't help, the best resource on Earth (the Bible) has the exact answers you need. As you value your relationships here on Earth, so you should hold with more regard the most important relationship of all - one with God. God is .. your father, your friend, your counselor, your comforter, your adviser and SO MUCH MORE. Treat Him like that! Talk to Him frequently, seek His counsel, make Him a priority, rely on Him, keep it real with Him. None of these other relationships will work if you don't develop and nurture one with Him first. It's never too late to start.

*Just a few basic principles discussed in the meeting ....

1. LOVE, LOVE AND LOVE UNTIL YOU CAN'T ANYMORE.

Show compassion, be supportive and encouraging, make sacrifices. 

2. Be humble. 

You're not always going to be wrong, but be humble enough to find a solution no matter the circumstance.

3. Establish and be familiar with your boundaries and theirs as well.

4. Practice clear communication. 

Don't leave room for misunderstanding to grow into something else. Be open and honest!!

5. Set a foundation.

Establish a purpose for the relationship and work towards it.

6. Nourish, Nourish, Nourish.

Check on each other, confide in each other, advise each other. Tell each other the complete truth at all times. Trust and be trustworthy. Put in as much effort as you would expect someone else to..and then some!

Reference Verses/Passages: 

All relationships : 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 , 1 Corinthians 15:33, Proverbs 4:23, Proverbs 15:22, 

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, Matthew 5:38-42, Hebrews 10:24

Relationships with parents: Ephesians 6:1-3, Deuteronomy 5:16

Relationships with friends: Hebrews 10:24-25, Proverbs 18:24

You are a Princess

 Every girl, at one point in time, goes through a phase where she thinks she isn't pretty enough or feels lonely because she doesn't have a mate. 1. You're God's creation so doubting your beauty is doubting His artwork and 2. This may sound cliche but you are never alone, God is ALWAYS with you. Often times we compare ourselves to the girls on social networks with "100+ likes" or the girls that always have a guy's company or even the girls in "happy" relationships. I put happy in quotes because not everything that is publicized is reality. You don't need any of that for validation! You were created, uniquely, for a special purpose. Let this letter be a reminder for you to celebrate the fact that there is only one YOU in the whole world and the purpose you were created for belongs to YOU and you alone, because you are so special.

My lovely princess,

Don't you know how beautiful you are? How I created you to look the way you do and no one else? You don't need a mate or other's approval to reassure you of your beauty. I am the King of Kings, the sculptor of sculptors, the artist of ALL artists and YOU are my creation. Every hair on your head, every freckle on your face, even the way you smile belongs specifically to you. Do not feel lonely either. I am working on you. How can I have your attention if you're focused on and worried about everything else? Don't worry my daughter, I am molding you to go out into the world and do extraordinary things in my name. Consider all the changes happening in your life and learn to accept them. You are my flower and I am preparing you to bloom. Do not worry about a mate, I have prepared specifically for you a prince worthy of loving you and you alone. Remember, you are my child and I would never do you any harm. Rejoice at all times, for the best is yet to come if you just trust me. I love you.

Love, God

Boundaries

   

 I truly apologize for such a late post in regards to our most recent meeting. This past month's topic was Boundaries. Such a huge and broad topic to discuss however we were able to pinpoint the essentials. Boundaries are defined as personal guidelines or limits one may create to define their personal lifestyle. Appropriate limits can be identified for different relationships (family, friends, professional, romantic). Setting boundaries is essential to remain physically and emotionally healthy, however it's never easy to decide when, where or how they should be set. The 10 helpful steps below 
(source: http://www.lifecoachingforchristianwomen.com), serve as just general guidelines to help you step in the right direction.

Ten Key Principles in Setting Boundaries

1.  Seek God’s will – Listen to God, not others. “Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe.” Proverbs 29:25

2.  Love their soul – Love is not taking the easy way out by being “nice.”  Nice is an American concept, love is the biblical goal.

3.  Love sincerely – Love is the key ingredient in every relationship. When you love someone, everything you do is for him and nothing you do or say comes from a vengeful or punishing perspective.

4.  Have supportive relationships – Surround yourself with godly friends who will encourage and support you in doing the right thing.

5.  Take responsibility for your own actions – Rarely is the problem the fault of only one person. If you own your part of the problem, the other person will be more likely to accept your boundaries.

6.  Invite them to change – The first step in confronting someone should never be a limit, but always an invitation to change.

7.  Warn them – If you just set limits out of the blue, this person may feel ambushed and become angry at you. A warning, on the other hand, gives her a choice.

8. Be patient – A warning, if not accompanied with patience, is an ultimatum. Patience means providing the ingredients for growth while allowing that person time to respond.             

9. Follow through with consequences – Remember that consequences have nothing to do with anger, revenge, or punishment. They are there to protect you and to help this person deal with the reality of her actions. 

10. Practice continual forgiveness – Don’t give negative attitudes a chance to grow – practice forgiveness day by day.

During the meeting, a few examples were given just to get the group flowing with ideas on how they would react in certain situations. Here is one example we used:

1.  Jessica always goes to Nicole when she hears the latest gossip. Nicole knows that gossiping is wrong but she feels bad not “listening” to her friend. How can she avoid gossiping with Jessica but still remain friends.

  *Change the subject if you see where it’s going.

  *Confront the issue head on and say, "I’d love to talk about anything else as long as it’s not about someone else or their drama.

In any situation, you must be strong enough to stand firm in your decision because there will always be testing moments.Lastly we had a more personal activity. Before setting your boundaries, you should be able to recognize where and how they have been crossed in the first pl ace and diffrent  ways you'd like to fix them. The girls worked individually and were given writing utensils and construction paper. On one side they wrote boundaries that had been crossed and the other they wrote ideas on how to fix them. Because some things can get really personal, they were asked to share at least one more general situation and their plan of action on how to fix it. We're all for respecting people's privacy but some things do need to be shared in order to help one another. You never know when someone may be having a similar issue and your solution just may be the answer they need! Sharing testimonies and ideas is a very important part of building each other up and that is the exact reason we are here! This meeting was great because we were able to share ideas and offer advice to those who werent sure how to set limits for certain situations. God does call us to love one another and put each other first HOWEVER that is not grounds for us to accept just about anything and be doormats, we're children of God for crying out loud! Let us know our worth and set proper boundaries! xoxo

Other announcements: Thanks to all our supporters we were able to sell 51 shirts out of our goal of 50!!! We raised $204.00 and everything will be going towards supplies and other S.A.V.E.D. activities. The shirts will be handed out at our next meeting : September 20th!! If you cant make it, please contact Benine Mudymba via email: bmudymba08@gmail.com.

       Upcoming events: Next meeting: September 20th @ 6:00 pm

                                        UNOW (United Night of Worship) : September 28th - perfect opportunity for us to show off our shirts and enjoy a great worship experience, you dont want to miss it!!! Check out our facebook for more information (www.facebook.com/saved13.org).

The Struggle; Through it all, God is Still God.

                                  
What are you currently struggling with? Is it financial issues, family issues, spiritual issues? Whatever the case may be, you need to know that God is still God. We're human, it's totally normal to lose sight of God's greatness in the midst of our struggles. We let our minds get so consumed in how to find a solution that we forget God IS the solution. Have you ever wanted or felt you needed something so bad that you thought your life would be complete when you get it; all for it to not even be enough? Yea...I know the feeling, not worth it at all.
           "But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matthew 6:33). God tells us that if we focus on Him and our relationship with Him, everything else will follow! But how often do we really do that? We go to God and pray for that job we've been dying to get or that amount of money we need to pay off those bills but we don't ask God to continue to mold, shape and lead us into the women/men that He has created us to be. That's the secret to your blessings. God doesn't PUT struggle in your life, but sometimes He allows it so that you can learn to be dependent on Him and Him alone. Money, jobs, clothes and other material things come and go but God's grace and love is eternal..AND sufficient. You'll never be satisfied chasing after everything else.
           Lets look at the story of Jacob (Genesis 32:22-32). Have you ever realized that in the Bible, God calls His people His "sheep" a lot? It's because just like sheep, we tend to stray away from the path that has already been paved for our lives. These occasional struggles help us realize, we are NOTHING without the guidance of our shepherd. God broke Jacob's hip so that he could be dependent solely on Him. Jacob complied and never let go of God until He blessed Him (Genesis 32:26). Now, I'm not saying rely and depend on God until you get your blessings then go about your way, but rely and depend on God AT ALL TIMES. When things are going great, when things are stagnant and especially when things are sour.
           Remember that through it all, God is still God. His plans are set for you, not because of what you do, but because of His greatness (Ephesians 2:8-9). HIS will is far greater than your dreams, so stop worrying, He knows what lies ahead. Rejoice in your struggle (Romans 5:3-5)...I know, easier said than done but channel that worry, that hurt, that frustration into something that will glorify God. Spend more quiet time with God, join a ministry in church, discover your God given talent and use it to your advantage! You have the potential to do so much more when you focus on God and let Him take care of the rest. Again, always remember, God is still God and I don't even have to tell you how great He is, just have faith in Him and watch Him work His "magic". He'll never do anything to harm you, He loves you way too much. I pray this has given you the courage to stand up to your struggle and push forward, God bless you. <3

What S.A.V.E.D. means to me...

       S.A.V.E.D. was created as an acronym for "Sisters After Virtue, Edification and Diligence", but it also has so many other meanings. Being SAVED is not just a “Christian thing” and the group is not just another regular bible study/prayer group. It has a much deeper meaning. S.A.V.E.D. represents a group of many young women coming together for the sole purpose to encourage and empower each other on their daily walks of life and with God. We are all “S.A.V.E.D.” by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8), but the group also represents being “S.A.V.E.D.” from addiction, from abuse, from stress, basically from any sort of negativity that we struggle to break free from in our lives. To give our supporters a better understanding, we asked a few of our S.A.V.E.D. sisters to explain what the group means to them. Happy reading!

Nana Ama Erzuah
Chicago, Illinois

       As women growing up in a superficial world where women are viewed as so many negative things and double standards play a major role in society, S.A.V.E.D. has definitely been a platform for me to surround myself with such positive, strong minded women who are able to not only empower each other but bring out the good in us and our communities we live in. Being a part of S.A.V.E.D. has helped me a lot to grow spiritually and having a deeper relationship with God. I also know that I am never alone, and someone will always be there to support me in my walk. Thank you S.A.V.E.D. for being a great support system!

Live Manuelo
Malden, Ma

      When I think about being S.A.V.E.D., it is more than being rescued from a bad relationship, a bad job, bad behaviors or bad habits. Being S.A.V.E.D. is recognizing the master of your life for who He is, the One who gave you the breath that you possess, the One who constantly protect you even when you don't deserve that protection. Once you are willingly aware and ready to accept Him as your Lord and Savior, then you are in the process of being S.AV.E.D. In John 6:35, the Lord declares "I am the bread of life. He that comes to me will not get hungry at all, and he that exercises faith in me will never get thirsty at all". As S.A.V.E.D. sisters we all have one common goal which is seeking the bread of life. With different tactics and different experiences, we unite as one to seek for His kingdom. Becoming completely S.A.V.E.D. is a journey, one that can even take a lifetime, for we are sinners who sin daily. S.A.V.E.D. sisters provides that support system that each individual seeking the kingdom of God is in need of. We are there to guide, advise and remind each other that we are not alone in this journey. Although it may get very hard at times, giving up is NOT an option. A lot of us newly born again Christians find it very difficult to stay on the right path, we often seek mentors to keep us on track.That is where S.A.V.E.D comes in. S.A.V.E.D. gives each and every one of us the best gift we can ask for on our journey: understanding, support and love. 2 Corinthians 8:7 declares "Let each one do just as he has resolved in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver". At S.A.V.E.D., the ladies share their wisdom acquired through life experiences with pure and open hearts. S.A.V.E.D. is the home for every born again or in the process of becoming born again Christians. Everyone is welcome and at no point will you EVER be judged. S.A.V.E.D. to me is a family, a family who want to help me grow as a strong women exhibiting an image of God. 

Nathalie Mukadi
Everett,Ma

        I am not a shy person,but can be anti-social.The thought of being around people that I do not know and who do not know me,usually does not settle well with me. I used to like being in my comfort zone. which would usually be with people I know and have known for years. Then the Holy Spirit revealed to me, that I cannot desire to serve God, walk and live the Christian life by being a comfortable Christian. I must become an "uncomfortable,comfortable Christian" . Meaning leaving my comfortable zone  to interact with others, being a blessings to others, sharing wisdom and knowledge through life experiences and testimonies. But also to be blessed by other people's life testimonies, wisdom and knowledge. So that is why I joined the S. A. V. E.D. ministry. I wanted to grow spiritually, to learn from other women 's life experience and challenges. But also to share my wisdom,  knowledge that God had graciously granted me and my testimonies. The ministry is a judgement free environment where everyone values the opinion of others. In my eyes, my S.A.V.E.D sisters are: Sanctified, Amazing, Virtuous, Empowered and Devoted women of God!

Ornelie Mukadi
Everett,Ma

       S.A.V.E.D. for me is a group of women who chose to unite in order to learn about living a life with God and empower each other in every way possible. It represents such great strength and wisdom. The experiences, ideas and responses shared during meetings have benefited each participant in some way. S.A.V.E.D. is my source of encouragement to keep pressing.

    

Benine Mudymba
Founder of S.A.V.E.D.
Malden, Ma

         S.A.V.E.D. means more to me than I could have ever imagined. It's my passion, not only because God placed it on my heart to start it but also because I have faith that it will help change so many young women's lives. Not every girl is blessed to have positive 'big sister" influences like I did when I first started my walk with Christ, and that is something we all need to keep us accountable to God. We need that support system to help us when we don't know what to do on our own and refuse to conform to the ways of the world. S.A.V.E.D. is a sisterhood just trying to better themselves and honor God in an extraordinary way. No stress, no judgement, just love <3

Annoucements: 
-Our next meeting is Friday, August 23rd at 5:45 pm discussing Boundaries. 
- Buy a S.A.V.E.D. tshirt to support our fundraiser at:      campaign.customink.com/savedfundraiser

July 19th,2013- Peer Pressure & Righteous Friendships

      This past Friday, we had another great group of women join us for our FOURTH meeting! Praise God for what He has started and will carry until completion! Peer pressure, defined as "social pressure by members of one's peer group to take a certain action, adopt certain values or conform in order to be accepted", is extremely common in this day and age. Often times, as Christians, we think its okay to have one foot in Christ and the other in the world just to seem "normal" or fit in. However we need to remember that although we are in this world, we are not of it (John 15:19). This means that just because others think it is ok, if it isn't pleasing to God, we shouldn't even entertain it. Nobody is perfect though, and sometimes we do give in, willingly and/or subconsciously. The purpose of this meeting was to discuss how the ladies deal with certain peer pressures and come up with different ways to avoid these situations. We were all there to share and learn from each other.
      This wonderful group of women each received a list of questions pertaining to peer pressure that they were to answer individually and later discuss in the larger group. Based on general consensus, the most common forms of peer pressure are about: marriage, swearing, and clubbing/partying. Other examples may also include physical appearance and what you watch and listen to. No one should ever push you into something you are not comfortable doing, especially if you feel convicted not to. Some ways to deal with certain peer pressures can be to distance yourself from the people or group of people, find an alternative to the situation and most importantly confide in someone who could hold you accountable for your actions.
       Peer pressure is not something we should have to deal with on our own either. That is where righteous friendships come in. The girls said that "righteous" was a strong word...YES it is, but also a great way to depict the importance of such a friendship. When asking the girls what a righteous friendship is to them, they basically were right on with their answers. Such a friend builds you up, holds you accountable, pushes you in a POSITIVE direction, genuinely loves you and helps you grow spiritually, mentally and emotionally. If that is not what is happening in your life...GIRL, it's time to reevaluate your friendships! Not only should you have righteous friendships but you should also be that great friend to another. How? First and foremost by your behavior. Just like children, we are more likely to follow what we see than what we hear. Think of some things you find yourself in the habit of doing. Did you start because someone told you it was the right thing to do? Or did you see a positive example doing the same and how it worked for them? Also, never forget to pray for your friends and speak to them in love. Study them a little, see how they react to certain things and find ways that they would be more inclined to listen or follow your direction.
         We are only human and yes we do fall into things that may not be pleasing to God. He will meet you where you are, but you have to be willing to move forward and not look back. God loves you and will always find a way to help you! <3

Different Seasons

          

         Another great meeting with an amazing set of ladies. We really were able to open up and share personal examples of times we've experienced the topic discussed. These meetings were created to allow young women to feel comfortable and be transparent about ANYTHING, but they're also a great way to let loose after a busy week, laugh and enjoy each other's company and that is exactly what we did! Starting off with reading Ecclesiastes 3:1-11. We discussed the different spiritual seasons. The girls then participated in a critical thinking activity. They were given 4 real life scenarios to read. After reading each scenario, it was the group's responsibility to discuss what season they thought the person was in for that particular scenario, a few things that helped them know it was really that particular season and what are some things they would do if they were in that season.

         Just like each season varies depending on where we are geographically, There are spiritual seasons that we need to recognize as we continue to mature in Christ. They are not particularly named but they can be compared to natural seasons. Spiritual seasons vary on where we are spiritually. And no just because it is Summer in New England, does NOT mean you are in Summer spiritually! Each season God puts us in is preparation for the next in which we will have a unique role or purpose.

Description of Spiritual Seasons

Winter: A time of brokenness where you feel God has forgotten about you or isn't hearing your prayers. However, it should be the time where you decide to cling closer to and REST in Him more than you ever have. Its probably one of the most uncomfortable seasons for a Christian. Where we feel nothing is going right. 

        Example: Not finding a job, not getting into a desired school, losing friendships, a general stop on all opportunities.

Spring: Newness of life!! Spring time may mean planting new opportunities and new activities. Maybe a new way to do devotions or a new ministry God wants to put you in, new relationships or new ways to serve God. Whatever it may be,follow Gods lead on everything and be obedient.

        Example: Getting engaged, joining a new church, starting a new ministry, new friendships.

Summer:  A time of spiritual development to nurture the gifts God has given to you. It’s a time for prayer (more than usual) over the seeds or projects you’ve started in your previous season. They become fully grown and everything seems "peachy" but this is the season to cling on to God and stay connected to Him because if not careful, we forget where we came from. We forget what God has done for us and become spiritually arrogant because we think that we "made" it on our own when in reality it's God's grace and favor that got us there. Always make sure to keep your relationship with God in check!

        Example: Making sure you're nurturing the new relationships you've started, 
       continuing to put forth effort in that new idea God placed on your heart, doing 
       the right thing at work even though you may dislike your job and want to leave.

Fall: A time of transition and reflection, things start to slow down. You find yourself maybe reevaluating your values and priorities. You start to go back to the basics of faith.

        Example: Realizing certain traits you need to work on personally,cutting back on certain unnecessary friendships, mending relationships, change in taste buds (music, tv shows, environment).

Keep in mind that it is possible to be in different seasons in different aspects of your life. You may be in financial Winter, but Spring when it comes to relationships, etc. Its important for us to recognize which season we are in, in order to hear God's exact instruction for our life. God always gives us instructions but each one has its time, no season is ever permanent. Our task as women of God is to remain content in whatever the situation may be and keep our focus on our relationship with Him more than anything else.

So, there are basically two somewhat neutral seasons, one really awesome and one really uncomfortable. Here are a few things that might help you deal with whatever season you may currently be in.

•       SEEK HIM. Spend more time with God than usual.
•   Pray for clarity and wisdom and not what you "want" or "need".
•     Transparency, be COMPLETELY open with God about how you feel during this time.
•  Use prayer as a conversation with God. Bring your cares and worries to 
•     Him before complaining to anyone else.
•  Wait on Him,don't try to "fix" your life or situation on your own. God always wins.
•   Memorize and recite scripture that pertains to your current situation. (2 Timothy 3:16)
•    Lastly, always remember that you are a beloved child of God and He wants the best for you in His time. (Galatians 6:9)