Let's Talk About Love (Not just romance.)

            Love is: dangerous, kind, selfless, patient, pure, risky, strengthening, unconditional, tough, hopeful, beautiful, sacrifice, encouraging and forgiving. These are just a few thoughts of what the girls described love as this past meeting. Such a small word, with such great and so many different meanings. How would YOU describe love if you had the chance? How do you love others? How do you recognize others' love for you? Today, the word is used so lightly that we have forgotten what it truly represents. 

           For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. - John 3:16. This is a verse we talk about and recite and see so often but do we really understand what it means? Does your definition of love match up with the love God has for us? For those of you with children, would you be willing to give up your ONLY child in place of someone who knowingly does you wrong continuously? Or think about your most prized possession or the person that means the most to you. Would you be willing to give that person away or let them be tortured and crucified for the sake of someone else who hurt or went against you? If you’re honest with yourself, the real answer is probably "no", but that’s just to show how deep God’s love for us is. He was able to give up someone so valuable, so dear, so unique and irreplaceable to Him for a world of sinners. I don’t know about you but that’s the deepest love I've ever seen! If we truly dig deep and try to understand this verse, we see such a beautiful sacrifice for us that we are nowhere near worthy of. Who are we to deserve such an unconditional act?

        Just like there are many descriptions of love, there are also many ways to show love. We were all created to emulate the love God has for us to our neighbor in any way we can; whether we know them or not. Last night, we also discussed the many "love languages". Everyone was created differently and everyone loves differently. For some, its physical contact, others its affirmation, others is acts of service and there are so many more. You can't expect someone to love you a certain way just because that's the way you love them. One thing we fail to acknowledge is that just because someone is showing it differently doesn't mean they don't love you. Society focuses so much on love being romance but there is SO much more to it. Love is forgiving through the hurt, anger and bitterness. Love is a simple smile to a stranger. Love is lending a helping hand even when its inconvenient or uncomfortable. Love is Jesus and even when you feel alone, His love will be there; unconditionally and eternally. I pray that you are able to feel this REAL love and share it with those around you. XO

             

Inner Beauty

Unfortunately, this month we were unable to have a meeting. We still would like to share thoughts on this month's topic!

For You created my inmost being;

You knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Your works are wonderful,

I know that full and well. 

    - Psalm 139: 13-14

            Society tells us that beauty is solely based upon physical appearance. A beautiful woman seems to be the one with long, straight hair, without blemishes, a fit body, the list can go on and on. The full meaning of beauty goes so much deeper than that. God's definition of beauty lies within our hearts.Your true, inner beauty is based on the confidence you have in yourself to know your identity in Christ, to know that you are FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made. You could have a great physical appearance, but is your heart in shape? We were created in God's image (Genesis 1:27), in order to reflect Him, not physically, but spiritually. How can I possibly reflect One so perfect and flawless, you may ask? The answer is to focus. Set your eyes on Christ. Realize that your validation comes from Him and Him ALONE. You don't need attention from the opposite sex, you don't need 100 likes on Facebook and Instagram, you don't need to be in a relationship to boost your confidence. You are so special and unique that God took the time to count every hair on your head, every freckle on your face, to mold the shape of your cheeks and most importantly to give you life. Embrace your natural features, don't seek to enhance them. That's almost like telling God you're not happy with His work. Just as much as you take joy in Him blessing you, see the way He created you as one of the biggest blessings you've ever received!
            God isn't concerned about your physical features, because He knows His works are good (Genesis 1:31).God looks at the personality that shapes your heart. All the outward beauty is fine and dandy now and will eventually fade but a beautiful soul will eternally please Him. Back to reflecting Him... A great way to start is with the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23) ; love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,faithfulness,gentleness and  self-control. Meditating on each one separately really does help to strengthen whichever weaknesses you may have (finding verses that talk about each one, thinking of ways to apply them to your daily life or even reflecting on times you could have used one or all of them). Now, this isn't to say that just because you are one of God's great creations that you shouldn't take care of yourself. Because we were created by God, we are His temple in which the Holy Spirit dwells. That means our bodies are SACRED and we all know that we should treat anything sacred with care. This includes everyday things like good hygiene (showering and brushing teeth twice a day, wearing deodorant and lotion), eating right! (a personal weakness, it took me a long time to finally let go of my fast food demons), staying active, yearly check-ups and so much more! Always remember, you are God's precious and unique creation, embrace and take care of yourself! xoxo

Finances/Budgeting

        

      

         It's time to create a budget and stop spending money, not knowing where it all went! A budget is an estimate of income and expenditure for a set period of time. We are going to focus more on a  MONTHLY budget just because that’s how frequent most of our bills are due. The importance of having a budget is a way for you to keep track of your money. If you don’t know what you’re spending your money on, you’ll never be able to see what you have been working for, or even save for things in the future. A budget also allows you to be smart with certain expenses. Maybe you noticed this month you spent more on eating out than you were supposed to, you’ll be able to figure out a game plan on how to spend less for next month. 

       From a Christian perspective, when creating a budget, your first priority should be tithing. Tithing is an opportunity for us to show God that He is first in our lives and to give Him back a portion of what He has given us, technically it’s all His. It is 10% (but not limited to, it can be more if your heart desires) of what you make. There isn't a clear scripture that says whether to tithe from your net or gross income. It is advised to tithe from your gross which is before taxes or anything else is taken out of it. This is one of the many ways of showing that God is your main priority.

     *Since we are budgeting on a monthly perspective let’s use the example of Suzy making $200 a week which is $600 a month.

     *For the month, $20 a week which is $80 a month should go to tithing. That leav her with $520 a month.

               After tithing, your next priority is making a realistic budget based on your necessary expenses. Create a budget where you have room to save but it doesn't lead you to constantly go into your savings to be able to pay for other things. Often times we think we can try and save more than half of our income a month but it just doesn't work like that. Even if the amount is as little as $50 a week, that will be about $1200 in six months so it all adds up. The best way to start a budget is making a list of all monthly expenses, starting off with bills and other priorities. For an example, Suzy who gets paid $600 a month has the following bills : $80 a month for tithing ,$90 a month for her phone, $120 for car insurance and she spends $40 weekly on gas which is $160 a month on gas. In total her “essential expenses" are: $450. That leaves her with $150 a month.

             Now that the important stuff is out of the way, the next category in your budget can be unnecessary expenses. This is really anything you want to put in and whichever amount you feel makes sense. It could be from eating out, maybe extra gas needed for unexpected places, even a little shopping. For that, Suzy puts away $100 a month, so $25 a week. She just knows that that is her limit a week if she wants to do extra stuff.

               Suzy is now left with $50 a month. THIS is what goes into her savings account each month. As you can see, it’s reasonable and it allows Suzy to afford everything without having to constantly go into her savings account. It seems like a little but like I said earlier, this “little” amount adds up long term.

*Try it out!! Make a list of your expenses for the month and specify each amount. Know your priorities and recognize your unnecessary expenses. After you've set this up, try putting it in a place where you'll be able to see it frequently and help you remember your limits. The more you organize, the more you save. Happy saving!

Relationships - Not just romance.

       As soon as we mention the word: relationships, everyone's thoughts automatically lead to wife/husband, girlfriend/boyfriend, but those aren't the only relationships God has given us to nurture. Close friends, distant friends, siblings, other family members, coworkers, classmates, parents are just a few on the list of important relationships we have a responsibility to take care of. A flower cannot grow, but instead withers when it isn't properly taken care of. It needs sunlight, moisture, the right soil, etc. The same goes for relationships; your effort into making it work is just as important as the next person's. The biggest lesson to learn in dealing with relationships is to LOVE. No, saying "I love you" occasionally and buying a few gifts here and there does not justify truly loving a person. The gospel tells us that Jesus loved us SO much, SO deeply that He sacrificed His own life for us!! *Mind blowing* Would you be willing to do the same for some of your relationships? Probably not. That's why we are not Jesus. All we can do is put in the most effort to emulate His love for us to others by serving them, being there for them when needed the most, supporting them and pushing them into a positive direction and most importantly leading by example. Sometimes it will require great sacrifice but just keep in mind that they will never amount to the greatest sacrifice of all time that was made for YOU. Do you find yourself growing in some of the relationships you are in or are they only setbacks to your purpose in life? That's not where it ends either though. Are you doing your part in the particular relationships as well?
        The topic of relationships is so broad that it is impossible to cover every single situation and question in a given amount of time. During our last two meetings, we were able to ask specific, anonymous questions that were read out loud and discussed by the group. There isn't ever a definite correct answer to every situation, but getting other's point of view will help put things in perspective more. This does not mean ask everyone you know but find someone you can truly trust to confide in and that is knowledgeable enough to speak life into you about the situation. No one can ever be an expert in relationships but we all can learn how to handle them better. These are a few principles however that can apply to a majority of relationships and if that still doesn't help, the best resource on Earth (the Bible) has the exact answers you need. As you value your relationships here on Earth, so you should hold with more regard the most important relationship of all - one with God. God is .. your father, your friend, your counselor, your comforter, your adviser and SO MUCH MORE. Treat Him like that! Talk to Him frequently, seek His counsel, make Him a priority, rely on Him, keep it real with Him. None of these other relationships will work if you don't develop and nurture one with Him first. It's never too late to start.

*Just a few basic principles discussed in the meeting ....

1. LOVE, LOVE AND LOVE UNTIL YOU CAN'T ANYMORE.

Show compassion, be supportive and encouraging, make sacrifices. 

2. Be humble. 

You're not always going to be wrong, but be humble enough to find a solution no matter the circumstance.

3. Establish and be familiar with your boundaries and theirs as well.

4. Practice clear communication. 

Don't leave room for misunderstanding to grow into something else. Be open and honest!!

5. Set a foundation.

Establish a purpose for the relationship and work towards it.

6. Nourish, Nourish, Nourish.

Check on each other, confide in each other, advise each other. Tell each other the complete truth at all times. Trust and be trustworthy. Put in as much effort as you would expect someone else to..and then some!

Reference Verses/Passages: 

All relationships : 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 , 1 Corinthians 15:33, Proverbs 4:23, Proverbs 15:22, 

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, Matthew 5:38-42, Hebrews 10:24

Relationships with parents: Ephesians 6:1-3, Deuteronomy 5:16

Relationships with friends: Hebrews 10:24-25, Proverbs 18:24

You are a Princess

 Every girl, at one point in time, goes through a phase where she thinks she isn't pretty enough or feels lonely because she doesn't have a mate. 1. You're God's creation so doubting your beauty is doubting His artwork and 2. This may sound cliche but you are never alone, God is ALWAYS with you. Often times we compare ourselves to the girls on social networks with "100+ likes" or the girls that always have a guy's company or even the girls in "happy" relationships. I put happy in quotes because not everything that is publicized is reality. You don't need any of that for validation! You were created, uniquely, for a special purpose. Let this letter be a reminder for you to celebrate the fact that there is only one YOU in the whole world and the purpose you were created for belongs to YOU and you alone, because you are so special.

My lovely princess,

Don't you know how beautiful you are? How I created you to look the way you do and no one else? You don't need a mate or other's approval to reassure you of your beauty. I am the King of Kings, the sculptor of sculptors, the artist of ALL artists and YOU are my creation. Every hair on your head, every freckle on your face, even the way you smile belongs specifically to you. Do not feel lonely either. I am working on you. How can I have your attention if you're focused on and worried about everything else? Don't worry my daughter, I am molding you to go out into the world and do extraordinary things in my name. Consider all the changes happening in your life and learn to accept them. You are my flower and I am preparing you to bloom. Do not worry about a mate, I have prepared specifically for you a prince worthy of loving you and you alone. Remember, you are my child and I would never do you any harm. Rejoice at all times, for the best is yet to come if you just trust me. I love you.

Love, God

Boundaries

   

 I truly apologize for such a late post in regards to our most recent meeting. This past month's topic was Boundaries. Such a huge and broad topic to discuss however we were able to pinpoint the essentials. Boundaries are defined as personal guidelines or limits one may create to define their personal lifestyle. Appropriate limits can be identified for different relationships (family, friends, professional, romantic). Setting boundaries is essential to remain physically and emotionally healthy, however it's never easy to decide when, where or how they should be set. The 10 helpful steps below 
(source: http://www.lifecoachingforchristianwomen.com), serve as just general guidelines to help you step in the right direction.

Ten Key Principles in Setting Boundaries

1.  Seek God’s will – Listen to God, not others. “Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe.” Proverbs 29:25

2.  Love their soul – Love is not taking the easy way out by being “nice.”  Nice is an American concept, love is the biblical goal.

3.  Love sincerely – Love is the key ingredient in every relationship. When you love someone, everything you do is for him and nothing you do or say comes from a vengeful or punishing perspective.

4.  Have supportive relationships – Surround yourself with godly friends who will encourage and support you in doing the right thing.

5.  Take responsibility for your own actions – Rarely is the problem the fault of only one person. If you own your part of the problem, the other person will be more likely to accept your boundaries.

6.  Invite them to change – The first step in confronting someone should never be a limit, but always an invitation to change.

7.  Warn them – If you just set limits out of the blue, this person may feel ambushed and become angry at you. A warning, on the other hand, gives her a choice.

8. Be patient – A warning, if not accompanied with patience, is an ultimatum. Patience means providing the ingredients for growth while allowing that person time to respond.             

9. Follow through with consequences – Remember that consequences have nothing to do with anger, revenge, or punishment. They are there to protect you and to help this person deal with the reality of her actions. 

10. Practice continual forgiveness – Don’t give negative attitudes a chance to grow – practice forgiveness day by day.

During the meeting, a few examples were given just to get the group flowing with ideas on how they would react in certain situations. Here is one example we used:

1.  Jessica always goes to Nicole when she hears the latest gossip. Nicole knows that gossiping is wrong but she feels bad not “listening” to her friend. How can she avoid gossiping with Jessica but still remain friends.

  *Change the subject if you see where it’s going.

  *Confront the issue head on and say, "I’d love to talk about anything else as long as it’s not about someone else or their drama.

In any situation, you must be strong enough to stand firm in your decision because there will always be testing moments.Lastly we had a more personal activity. Before setting your boundaries, you should be able to recognize where and how they have been crossed in the first pl ace and diffrent  ways you'd like to fix them. The girls worked individually and were given writing utensils and construction paper. On one side they wrote boundaries that had been crossed and the other they wrote ideas on how to fix them. Because some things can get really personal, they were asked to share at least one more general situation and their plan of action on how to fix it. We're all for respecting people's privacy but some things do need to be shared in order to help one another. You never know when someone may be having a similar issue and your solution just may be the answer they need! Sharing testimonies and ideas is a very important part of building each other up and that is the exact reason we are here! This meeting was great because we were able to share ideas and offer advice to those who werent sure how to set limits for certain situations. God does call us to love one another and put each other first HOWEVER that is not grounds for us to accept just about anything and be doormats, we're children of God for crying out loud! Let us know our worth and set proper boundaries! xoxo

Other announcements: Thanks to all our supporters we were able to sell 51 shirts out of our goal of 50!!! We raised $204.00 and everything will be going towards supplies and other S.A.V.E.D. activities. The shirts will be handed out at our next meeting : September 20th!! If you cant make it, please contact Benine Mudymba via email: bmudymba08@gmail.com.

       Upcoming events: Next meeting: September 20th @ 6:00 pm

                                        UNOW (United Night of Worship) : September 28th - perfect opportunity for us to show off our shirts and enjoy a great worship experience, you dont want to miss it!!! Check out our facebook for more information (www.facebook.com/saved13.org).

The Struggle; Through it all, God is Still God.

                                  
What are you currently struggling with? Is it financial issues, family issues, spiritual issues? Whatever the case may be, you need to know that God is still God. We're human, it's totally normal to lose sight of God's greatness in the midst of our struggles. We let our minds get so consumed in how to find a solution that we forget God IS the solution. Have you ever wanted or felt you needed something so bad that you thought your life would be complete when you get it; all for it to not even be enough? Yea...I know the feeling, not worth it at all.
           "But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matthew 6:33). God tells us that if we focus on Him and our relationship with Him, everything else will follow! But how often do we really do that? We go to God and pray for that job we've been dying to get or that amount of money we need to pay off those bills but we don't ask God to continue to mold, shape and lead us into the women/men that He has created us to be. That's the secret to your blessings. God doesn't PUT struggle in your life, but sometimes He allows it so that you can learn to be dependent on Him and Him alone. Money, jobs, clothes and other material things come and go but God's grace and love is eternal..AND sufficient. You'll never be satisfied chasing after everything else.
           Lets look at the story of Jacob (Genesis 32:22-32). Have you ever realized that in the Bible, God calls His people His "sheep" a lot? It's because just like sheep, we tend to stray away from the path that has already been paved for our lives. These occasional struggles help us realize, we are NOTHING without the guidance of our shepherd. God broke Jacob's hip so that he could be dependent solely on Him. Jacob complied and never let go of God until He blessed Him (Genesis 32:26). Now, I'm not saying rely and depend on God until you get your blessings then go about your way, but rely and depend on God AT ALL TIMES. When things are going great, when things are stagnant and especially when things are sour.
           Remember that through it all, God is still God. His plans are set for you, not because of what you do, but because of His greatness (Ephesians 2:8-9). HIS will is far greater than your dreams, so stop worrying, He knows what lies ahead. Rejoice in your struggle (Romans 5:3-5)...I know, easier said than done but channel that worry, that hurt, that frustration into something that will glorify God. Spend more quiet time with God, join a ministry in church, discover your God given talent and use it to your advantage! You have the potential to do so much more when you focus on God and let Him take care of the rest. Again, always remember, God is still God and I don't even have to tell you how great He is, just have faith in Him and watch Him work His "magic". He'll never do anything to harm you, He loves you way too much. I pray this has given you the courage to stand up to your struggle and push forward, God bless you. <3

What S.A.V.E.D. means to me...

       S.A.V.E.D. was created as an acronym for "Sisters After Virtue, Edification and Diligence", but it also has so many other meanings. Being SAVED is not just a “Christian thing” and the group is not just another regular bible study/prayer group. It has a much deeper meaning. S.A.V.E.D. represents a group of many young women coming together for the sole purpose to encourage and empower each other on their daily walks of life and with God. We are all “S.A.V.E.D.” by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8), but the group also represents being “S.A.V.E.D.” from addiction, from abuse, from stress, basically from any sort of negativity that we struggle to break free from in our lives. To give our supporters a better understanding, we asked a few of our S.A.V.E.D. sisters to explain what the group means to them. Happy reading!

Nana Ama Erzuah
Chicago, Illinois

       As women growing up in a superficial world where women are viewed as so many negative things and double standards play a major role in society, S.A.V.E.D. has definitely been a platform for me to surround myself with such positive, strong minded women who are able to not only empower each other but bring out the good in us and our communities we live in. Being a part of S.A.V.E.D. has helped me a lot to grow spiritually and having a deeper relationship with God. I also know that I am never alone, and someone will always be there to support me in my walk. Thank you S.A.V.E.D. for being a great support system!

Live Manuelo
Malden, Ma

      When I think about being S.A.V.E.D., it is more than being rescued from a bad relationship, a bad job, bad behaviors or bad habits. Being S.A.V.E.D. is recognizing the master of your life for who He is, the One who gave you the breath that you possess, the One who constantly protect you even when you don't deserve that protection. Once you are willingly aware and ready to accept Him as your Lord and Savior, then you are in the process of being S.AV.E.D. In John 6:35, the Lord declares "I am the bread of life. He that comes to me will not get hungry at all, and he that exercises faith in me will never get thirsty at all". As S.A.V.E.D. sisters we all have one common goal which is seeking the bread of life. With different tactics and different experiences, we unite as one to seek for His kingdom. Becoming completely S.A.V.E.D. is a journey, one that can even take a lifetime, for we are sinners who sin daily. S.A.V.E.D. sisters provides that support system that each individual seeking the kingdom of God is in need of. We are there to guide, advise and remind each other that we are not alone in this journey. Although it may get very hard at times, giving up is NOT an option. A lot of us newly born again Christians find it very difficult to stay on the right path, we often seek mentors to keep us on track.That is where S.A.V.E.D comes in. S.A.V.E.D. gives each and every one of us the best gift we can ask for on our journey: understanding, support and love. 2 Corinthians 8:7 declares "Let each one do just as he has resolved in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver". At S.A.V.E.D., the ladies share their wisdom acquired through life experiences with pure and open hearts. S.A.V.E.D. is the home for every born again or in the process of becoming born again Christians. Everyone is welcome and at no point will you EVER be judged. S.A.V.E.D. to me is a family, a family who want to help me grow as a strong women exhibiting an image of God. 

Nathalie Mukadi
Everett,Ma

        I am not a shy person,but can be anti-social.The thought of being around people that I do not know and who do not know me,usually does not settle well with me. I used to like being in my comfort zone. which would usually be with people I know and have known for years. Then the Holy Spirit revealed to me, that I cannot desire to serve God, walk and live the Christian life by being a comfortable Christian. I must become an "uncomfortable,comfortable Christian" . Meaning leaving my comfortable zone  to interact with others, being a blessings to others, sharing wisdom and knowledge through life experiences and testimonies. But also to be blessed by other people's life testimonies, wisdom and knowledge. So that is why I joined the S. A. V. E.D. ministry. I wanted to grow spiritually, to learn from other women 's life experience and challenges. But also to share my wisdom,  knowledge that God had graciously granted me and my testimonies. The ministry is a judgement free environment where everyone values the opinion of others. In my eyes, my S.A.V.E.D sisters are: Sanctified, Amazing, Virtuous, Empowered and Devoted women of God!

Ornelie Mukadi
Everett,Ma

       S.A.V.E.D. for me is a group of women who chose to unite in order to learn about living a life with God and empower each other in every way possible. It represents such great strength and wisdom. The experiences, ideas and responses shared during meetings have benefited each participant in some way. S.A.V.E.D. is my source of encouragement to keep pressing.

    

Benine Mudymba
Founder of S.A.V.E.D.
Malden, Ma

         S.A.V.E.D. means more to me than I could have ever imagined. It's my passion, not only because God placed it on my heart to start it but also because I have faith that it will help change so many young women's lives. Not every girl is blessed to have positive 'big sister" influences like I did when I first started my walk with Christ, and that is something we all need to keep us accountable to God. We need that support system to help us when we don't know what to do on our own and refuse to conform to the ways of the world. S.A.V.E.D. is a sisterhood just trying to better themselves and honor God in an extraordinary way. No stress, no judgement, just love <3

Annoucements: 
-Our next meeting is Friday, August 23rd at 5:45 pm discussing Boundaries. 
- Buy a S.A.V.E.D. tshirt to support our fundraiser at:      campaign.customink.com/savedfundraiser